One, an overly-educated, outdoors-type searching for his destiny in a new city; the other an easily amused observer of humanity who's just along for the ride. Armed with their wits, a digital camera & laptop, nationwide internet access, and a 2000 Chevy Blazer, our intrepid adventurers take you along with them as they rocket across the United States.

Back to Day 2

May 3, 2000: Denver - Kansas City, MO We're here... and ... and there are hills! No, you don't understand... there's terrain here! Real, honest-to-god rolling hills! As you can see, this desert rat who is used to opening a window to see mountains of granite and basalt is not used to 11 hours of driving through generally flat, green landscape. But I've come up with a theory. And I've dug up this photo to prove it. That's right. The secret that 'The Man' doesn't want you to know is that KANSAS IS GOD'S FAIRWAY! To be fair Kansas is a very beautiful state and once we were 2/3rds of the way across, the hills and streams and trees appeared on the horizon, as if to reward you for making it. Mike and I found ourselves thinking out-loud "Wow.. can you imagine living out here? What do you think they'd do if they woke up to see an 8000ft mountain outside their door? Have we moved an inch in the last hour?!"

Whole Lotta Nada The truth is out there: Kansas is God's top-secret golf course!

Thankfully Kansas knows that I-70 can be an endurance test and provides numerous, well appointed rest areas and FREE COFFEE! An interesting side note and question about all these rest areas: were they all designed to be cruise-compatible for the lonely truckers? Seemed like they served that role, intentional or not! The rest area outside of Salina in particular gets our "Most Crusty" award for the copious amount of dried semen in the stalls. (Sorry, no pictures. And NO, Mike and I didn't score) At least today there were a few cute drivers. One of them in particular, a dark-featured goateed woofer, was playing fallback-and-catchup for several hundred miles. Everytime he caught up he'd lean way forward and stare down into the cab of the Blazer. I wanted to give him something to see, but Mike thought that was a bit much. :) The day began in Denver with two buddies, Aaron (Mike's friend) and Jeff Stoner (one third of a great group of guys I've known for years now.) I took pictures of Jeff and Aaron but stupidly forgot to swap out flash cards. Which is a shame because they're both beautiful men. Jeff is a big burly grizzly (and one half of the creators of the Natural Bears Classification System) and Aaron is a bite-sized blonde-and-blue musclecub with a sharp wit and golden pelt. Mike continued his terrorist campaign against the wildlife of the Midwest with one near-miss with a dove and innumerable insect collisions. The rack on "Humphrey" (the name Mike came up with for the Blazer and it's totemic Disney dash-beanie) is taking on an extra crispy chitin coating. So after over 700 miles, and 56 grain elevators later (we counted) we rolled into KC MO around 11pm and right into bed, our brains numb from the numerous Stucky's and "Worlds Largest Prarie Dog" billboards. Tomorrow we hit the road for Columbus EARLY in hopes of actually making it into a city in time for dinner and some sight-seeing! And dammit... I need to find some fur to rub! -Kevin Jackson Kansas City, Missouri

Outside one of many well appointed rest areas in Kansas. (click for full-size pic) The Chevy's increasingly `crispy' rack. Many insects died to bring you this picture.

Next: Days 4 + 5

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